Maureen: I think we need an agent! Mark: We? Joanne: Thats selling out. Mark: But it’s nice to dream! Joanne: We may have our disputes Maureen: Yeah! It’s network TV And it’s all thanks to me! Mark: Somehow i think i smell a whif of a scheme! Joanne: Me too. Maureen: We can plan another…
(Lights up on MRS. COHEN, who’s standing on a chair and holding up a phone.) MRS. COHEN Mark, it’s the wicked witch of the west your mother Happy new year from Scarsdale We’re all impressed that the riot footage Made the nightly news Even your father says Mazeltov Honey — call him Love, Mom (MRS….
Mark Pan to the padlocked door. New Year’s rocking eve. The breaking-back-into-the-building party… Mimi How long till next year? Roger Three and a half minutes Mimi I’m giving up my vices I’m going back- Back to school Eviction or not this weeks been so hot As long as I got you I know I’ll be…
COMPANY 525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear. 525,600 minutes – how do you measure, measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee. In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife. In 525,600 minutes – how do you measure a year in the life? How about love? How about love? How…
(ROGER and MIMI exit. JOANNE reenters, obviously steamed.) MAUREEN Are we packed? JOANNE Yes and by next week I want you to be MAUREEN Pookie? JOANNE And you should see They’ve padlocked your building And they’re rioting on Avenue B Benny called the cops MAUREEN That fuck! JOANNE They don’t know what they’re doing The…
ROGER I should tell you I’m disaster I forget how to begin it MIMI Let’s just make this part go faster I have yet — to be in it I should tell you ROGER I should tell you MIMI I should tell you ROGER I should tell you MIMI I should tell I blew the…
(Downstage right, the PRINCIPALS have lined up and are waiting to be seated. A large table is situated down center. Down and to the right, BENNY and MR. GREY are seated at a smaller table. The RESTAURANT MAN tries to shoo our friends out.) RESTAURANT MAN No please no Not tonight please no Mister —…
MARK Maureen’s performance. MAUREEN (in front of a microphone) Last night I had a dream. I found myself in a desert called Cyberland. It was hot. My canteen had sprung a leak and I was thirsty. Out of the abyss walked a cow — Elsie. I asked if she had anything to drink. She said,…
FIVE HOMELESS PEOPLE Christmas bells are ringing Christmas bells are ringing Christmas bells are singing On TV – at Saks SQUEEGEEMAN Honest living, honest living Honest living, honest living Honest living, honest living ALL FIVE HOMELESS Can’t you spare a dime or two Here but for the grace of God go you You’ll be merry…
JOANNE (on cellular phone) Steve — Joanne The Murget case? A dismissal! Good work counselor (The pay phone rings. JOANNE answers it and begins a conversation with MAUREEN simultaneously juggling two other calls on her cellular phone.) We’re okay Honeybear — wait! I’m on the other phone Yes, I have the cowbell We’re okay (into…