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Seussical - - Lyrics

 

Military, The

SCHMITZ  The military academy  Is the place where he should be sent.  We'll drill the silliness from his head-  I'm sure we'll make a dent!  We'll teach him fighting  And left and righting  Until he's muscled and tan!  A-hut-two-three!  He's pathetic!  A-hut-two-three!  Unathletic!  A-hut-two-three!  But I'm betting we can!  The military!  That's what makes a boy...  A man!  (CADETS enter) CADETS Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, SCHMITZ Look at these boys.  Why, you'd never know that just a few short months ago this one hummed in the shower!  This one couldn't color within the lines. And this one actually had an Opinion! SCHMITZ Our boys believe  In the right of every who  To eat their bread  Butter side up!  CADETS Butter side up! SCHMITZ  One thing we trust On this fragile speck of dust Is eating bread  Butter side up! JOJO Butter side up?  SCHMITZ  And as for those who like their butter down CADETS  Down! Down! Down! SCHMITZ, CADETS  We'll go to war  And run them out of town!  (DANCE BREAK, in which the CADETS perform military exercises.  JOJO tries to imitate them with little success.) CADETS  A-hut-two-three!  SCHMITZ  We enlist 'em.  CADETS  A-Hut-Two-Three  SCHMITZ  In our system.  And boys soon see  Nothing's easier than...  The military!  SCHMITZ CADETS That's what makes a boy...  That's what makes a boy... That's what makes a boy ... That's what makes a boy...  A man!!! A man!!!  (SCHMITZ starts a "marching call" and the CADETS begin to march off in line.  JOJO tries to keep up.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 9.1 THE MILITARY (PLAYOFF: GREEN EGGS AND HAM) SCHMITZ  I do not like green eggs and ham!  CADETS  Do not like green eggs and ham!  SCHMITZ  I do not like them, Sam I am!  CADETS  Do not like them, Sam I am!  SCHMITZ  Sound off! CADETS  Eggs and ham!  SCHMITZ  Sound off! CADETS  Sam I am!  SCHMITZ & CADETS  I do not like green eggs...  And ham!  Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz, Schmitz... (JOJO'S PARENTS are gone as the scene transitions to JOJO'S military school,  HE is now alone in his bunk bed.  Simultaneously we see HORTON alone, guarding his clover. Night falls.)